Friday, August 20, 2010

love thy parents - a repost

i'm reposting this as part of PEBA's requirement for DS to be recognized officially as a nominee to this year's Pinoy Expats Blog Awards. 

since the theme is Strengthening OFW Families, I went back to all my postings under label me and my family.  and i must admit i went trhough an almost major decision coz i found 4 or 5 articles that i thought were strong enough to be my feature entry. in the end, i chose this one - the article i wrote a month before my mother died.  it talks about treasuring our old and frail parents - something that most of us were putting on the sidelines because of so many other priorities.  hope this touches everyone's hearts as it did mine when i was writing it.

pls vote for this blog by clicking here: http://www.pinoyblogawards.com/p/vote-here.html

love thy parents

Some people who work abroad have the luxury of spending their vacation in PI through partying and just having a good time. Unfortunately, hindi ako kasama sa category na yon coz I have other priorities. Vacation for me means something else. It’s caring for my 82-year old mom who is now suffering from one sickness after the other. That, on top of the fact that her broken hip joint had her confined to a wheelchair for the longest time now.

.Kaya ang bakasyon ko is mostly spent on giving her all the attention I can give. When she was still staying in Sta Rosa, I make sure that she gets to see the doctor for some check-up na hinding-hindi nya gagawin kung ang mga kasama lang nya sa bahay ang magyayaya sa kanya. I also make sure that she visits places na hindi rin nya gagawin kung sila-sila lang. Like going to the malls or eat out in a restaurant. At syempre, pag sya ang kasama ko, sa mga medyo pricey resto ang punta namin at hindi sa Chow King.

Now that she’s back in Mindoro, nawala naman ang pagiging sickly nya. In fact she gained some weight dahil sa magandang appetite. Maya-maya kain. Sleeps well too. Di tulad ng dati na kailangan ko pa syang ibili ng vitamins para lang kumain at makatulog ng maayos.

.But something happened that tested how far I can go when it comes to caring for her. Nagkaron sya ng skin infection na hindi ko alam kung saan nanggaling. The infection was so awful it covered most part of her body. At kung hindi ko sya mahal na Nanay, hinding-hindi ako lalapit sa kanya. Mahina ang sikmura ko sa ganon. Kaya nga hindi ako nag-doctor or nursing man lang. Madaling bumaliktad ang sikmura ko sa mga sugat, dugo at kung ano-ano pa.

But when I saw her suffer from severe discomfort, scratching herself to sleep, I felt so bad for her. Sabi ko google lang ang katapat nyan. I turned to herbal medicine dahil nasa probinsya naman at maraming dahon sa paligid.

I found Acapulco, a green leaf na parang larger version ng malunggay at namumulaklak ng kulay dilaw. Based on what I found, ito raw ang pinaka-magaling when it comes to skin diseases. It has to be pounded para kumatas at yong katas ang ipapahid sa infected areas.

I was even surprised with myself na ako mismo ang nagpapahid sa kanya ng gamot. At hindi ako naduwal o nadiri kahit kaunti. Ang naisip ko lang, I’ll do whatever it takes para gumaling ang nanay ko. And that’s when I realized na pag mahal mo pala talaga ang isang tao, you can do anything. Mawawala ang lahat ng kaartehan mo sa katawan.

The herbal treatment showed immediate effect. After one application, gumanda agad ang balat nya at medyo nabawasan ang pangangati. But I still looked for dermatologist the following day. Gusto ko pa rin syang ma-treat dahil baka internal ang source nong infection.

But then again, nasa Mindoro nga pala kami. In a place na inaabot naman ng Coke at dyaryo pero ang dermatologist ay available lang kung Sunday dahil nagki-clinic sa provincial capitol during weekdays. Hindi ko naman pwedeng ibyahe ang pasyente sa bako-bakong 100km ng kalsada na hindi naman naipagawa ng VP na taga-Mindoro pa naman. Otherwise sasakit na naman ng husto ang hip joint nyang na-dislocate.

So I had to continue the herbal medication. Sinamahan ko pa ng paligo ng sulfur soap at suporta ng Lamistin (the best anti-fungal cream sabi nong taga-Mercury Drug) na isang tube worth 300 pesos good for one day lang. But who cares. Her well-being is priceless.

After 5 days, okey na sya. Pwede na nga raw akong mag-albularyo sabi ng mga tao dito sa amin. Talk about finding a fallback huh! Pero sa tingin ko beyond the things na pinapahid, it’s the touch of care na nagpagaling sa kanya. Pag talagang inalagaan, gagaling. Aside from the fact na hindi sya maka-suway kapag ako ang gumagamot sa kanya. Eh numero uno pa namang pasaway. Doktor nga hindi umubra. Di lalo ang Ate ko at kahit sinong kasama sa bahay. Walang bawal-bawal sa kanya pag gusto nya. Mana yata sa akin sa katigasan ng ulo. Kaya sa akin din lang talaga sumusunod at naniniwala.

Did I feel shortchanged for having spent my vacation this way? Not at all. Kahit buong bakasyon ko pa ang magamit ko sa pag-aalaga sa kanya, it’s what I want. No doubt about it. Happiness for me is being behind her wheelchair every afternoon, walking her through the neighborhood. Masaya na akong nasa bahay at nakikita syang masarap kumain, mahimbing ang tulog at nakangiti sa pag-gising sa umaga.

Like most of my friends, I believe that one of the greatest love we can give in our lifetime is to love and care for our parents, specially the elderly. It's not just following one of God's Ten Commandments. It's not only because we owe them our lives. It's because we simply love them. Unconditionally. Anybody who’d disagree will have to do some serious thinking.

16 comments:

Carnation said...

indeed we should honour our father and mother and take care of them...whether we are near or far. all the best co-nominee!!

kiko said...

ang ganda! na miss ko bigla ang nanay ko… More Power brother! God Bless…

Ipe said...

Sobrang nakaka-touch ang blog mo. Love for mother (and parent in general) ang lagi kong pina-pangaral sa mga bata ngayon. I always wish, meron pa akong mother na mapag-u-ukulan ng pagmamahal. At the age of 5, naulila na ako sa mother. Kaya sa mga may mother pa, wag nyong hintaying mawala pa sila to realize their importance in your life. Saludo po ako sa article nyo!

jjr said...

dear ds,

thanks for this repost, i miss my family,,,

your fan

espiyangmandirigma said...

Touching and yet motivating... Another nice post that you share which gives inspiration and make me realized that its not too late for me to do my part for my Father... Thanks...

Dante said...

salamat po sa lahat ng bumisita at nag-comment...

i guess i'm more appreciative of the fact that my thought was read by more people now than i posted it earlier this year.

God bless us all who love our parents like heavens expected us to.

My Yellow Bells said...

hello Dante, by just simply reading your post, I have decided that I will be going home this December for my annual vacation na matagal ko nang hindi mapagdesisyunan, I really want to spend time with my mom. It is her birthday and I want to treat her like a queen. Thanks for posting this, I am sure pagpapalain ka ng Diyos dahil mahal mo ang nanay mo. Good to us in PEBA.

Dante said...

yellow bells,

ganyan din ako nong january. i was thinking of delaying my vacation. buti na lang i decided against it. coz 3 wks after coming back to saudi, my Nanay died.

kung hindi siguro ako tumuloy ng january at pinostpone ko pa much later, laking sisi ko siguro. and guilt is something i'm not good in handling. kaya ngayon, even if she's gone, i'm taking consolation from the fact that as much as i can, i gave her my full attention everytime na nasa Pinas ako.

salamat kung dahil sa posting na ito, making your decision became much easier.

Anonymous said...

It makes us miss our parents and the longing to care for them.

I just don't appreciate the side comments of making Chowking or any other fast food chain as being cheap. Nowadays having lunch, snack or dinner in a fast food chain is a treat for most Flipinos. Branding it as cheap is offensive to the economic status of most if not all kababayans.

But i a general sense, i like and appreciate the blog.

Dante said...

anonymous,

go back to the article and you'll never find the word 'cheap' anywhere near chowking.

it's unfortunate you'll view it that way, even taking it further to assume that i was talking about fastfood in general.

sometimes you have to take a statement as it is. putting so much more in it gives it an entirely different, sometimes askewed flavor.

°eGa° said...

tama....i dont think the statement was meant to brand Chowking as "cheap". lets just accept the fact that Chowking is not a pricey resto, that's it! he just probably wants to emphasize na he wants to bring his mom somewhere not so ordinary (ayan, baka ako naman ang mamis-interpret, hehehe), kasi minsanan lang sya umuwi...
talking about economic status of us Filipinos, hindi naman talaga tau a well off country so how can it be offensive sa atin?
ako , hindi naoffend. hehehe...

Bev said...

A post really needed to be shared, I wish you be able to reach more.

:-)

Nortehanon said...

Your mother was blessed to have you for a son. Maraming anak na hindi na nagagawang gampanan pa ang mag-alaga sa kanilang mga magulang. I am sure she appreciated all your efforts.

Just doing rounds among the PEBA 2010 entries.

Good luck to your entry, Dante.

terry said...

nice bog and your topics are so varied. but what caught my attention is your literary skill. taal na taal ka mag-tagalog and at the same time your english is very fluid. at pag pinag-halo mo it's still an easy read. very impressive. keep blogging.

Dante said...

wow! thanks terry... one of the best comments i've had so far. i was feeling lousy the whole day but when i read your comment, it was like a shot of adrenalin! thanks again

siyetehan said...

wala tayong hindi pwedeng gawin basta't para sa mahal natin.

napakaganda ng sinulat mo, kabayan.