the attack of tornadoes

half of my body is still aching from last night's adiks bowling tournament. masakit ang right hip bone ko down to my leg and my right shoulder is still passing most of the work to my left hand. buti nga hindi tumuloy yong blisters sa right thumb ko.

yan ba namang walang exercise at biglang sumabak sa two-game, twenty frames na labanan. minsan ko nga lang sinubukan yong heavier (was it 9-kg?) ball pero na-realize ko hanggang don lang ako sa lighter. and it allowed me to do a whole variety of stunts from a strike to spare, ma-kanal ang bola ko at humagis sa likod and almost hit one of the guys!

but it was one tremendously enjoyable afternoon with the adiks. thanks to orlee for sponsoring it "in honor" of his brother samuel roy (na ka-team mate ko together with raoul) and in the process blowing some serious cash from the intercon bill (for the bowling alley plus some refreshments na hindi makatarungan ang presyo) hanggang sa applebees where the awarding took place.

team tornado of ren, jun and irwin won. tinawag na tornado ni raoul dahil a week before the tourney eh panay na ang press release na super gagaling daw nila even quoting bowling greats paeng nepomuceno and bong coo as their supporters. eh sa totoo lang eh hindi pa naman nakakahawak ng bowling ball!!! true-blue adik talaga! hehehe...

but the psyching up paid off. nanalo nga sila, even beating ega's team who was leading after the first game. at kinopo pa lahat ng awards with jun winning the highest individual scorer. irwin who was getting frustrated from his many misses suddenly bounced back and even scored more than a hundred points on the second game after rolling a few strikes. ren also did a few tricks na nakaka-surprise para sa isang ngayon lang nakahawak ng bola. si ariel din was rolling a whole lot of strikes as well as ricky, matt, tito bong and rommel.

yong team namin ni raoul at roy? ah well, wala lang, basta nag-enjoy kami lahat sana maulit. but i doubt it if intercon will be happy if we'll be back for another tourney. eh halos mayanig ang buong hotel sa ingay ng mga adik!

here's a few pix from my cam and more of matt's shots on addicquotes na palagay ko eh ako pa rin ang mag-a-update!

mommy's little helper

nakuha ko lang sa files ni matt.... very funny!

pers taym mo?

April 22 19-- (ayaw pang pa-bisto huh) when I boarded a plane to Saudi Arabia. 23 years old lang ako non. Bata pa pero nag-isip agad rumaket ng mas malaki. Dahil naisip ko na walang mangyayari sa buhay ko kung sa Maynila lang ako magta-trabaho.

Destined naman talaga sigurong dito ako mapunta. Kasi ang application ko noon, ni hindi ko plinano. Gumigimik kami ng mga barkada ko noon sa Luneata (puro wala pa kaming pera kaya yon ang gimikan namin hehehe) at may nakita kaming mahabang pila sa may TM Kalaw. Recruitment agency pala papuntang Saudi. Sabi ko sa mga barkada ko, i-try namin. Naki-usyoso kami and out of curiosity, nakipila na rin.

Pagdating sa loob ng agency, yong iba sa mga barkada ko, nag-back out. Natakot yata. Dalawa lang kaming tumuloy sa interview. Pareho kaming pumasa pero nag-back out na rin yong isa, mukhang natakot din. Pero ako, sige lang. Sabi kasi sa akin nong interviewer, aalis daw ako within a week kung ready ang passport ko. Hmmm… parang lokohan yata ito!.

At any rate, naki-sakay lang ako sa sinasabi nila. Process ng ganito, ganong papel. NBI clearance, pa-medical, etcetera. Ang main purpose ko lang noon is to experience the whole process. Para pag ready na talaga ako to go abroad, alam ko na ang gagawin ko. Hindi ko kasi naisip that it will come too quickly and comfortably for me. First application tapos aalis agad ako? Parang hindi totoo. Kasi ang mga naririnig kong kwento, mahirap mag-apply sa abroad. So ini-expect ko na mahihirapan din ako. Unlike this one na parang naglalaro lang ako eh aalis na daw ako agad.

Kaya sakay lang ako ng sakay sa mga sinasabi nila. Pero nong sinisingil na ako ng placement fee, sabi ko di na to biro. Totohanan na. That’s when I started analyzing and thinking about the whole thing.

Nakalagay ang pangalan ko sa malaking bulletin board ng recruitment agency. Yong bulletin board na laging tinitingala ng mga nangangarap na aplikante. Parang laging nagwi-wish sa mga lucky stars nila at naghihintay na mag-magic para lumabas ang kanilang mga pangalan sa board. Ako, hindi ko na kailangang mag-wish. Nandoon na ang pangalan ko. At nakalagay, April ang ETD. Hmmm… Ibig sabihin kaya noon, totoong aalis ako?

Pinakita na rin sa akin ang passport ko na sila na ang gumawa. Ay ganon pala ang hitsura ng passport! Sosyal na ako ha, may passport na. Hindi na sa isang kapirasong cedula nakasulat ang pangalan ko. Passport na. At may picture ko pa! (Na-discover ko pa later na pineke lang nila ang birth certificate ko para madali ang pagkuha ng passport. Kinuha sa Manila City Hall ang certificate at siguradong naglagay para mapabilis. Matatagalan pa kasi kung uuwi pa ako ng Mindoro para kunin ang certificate ko.).

Hmmm… mukhang totoo naman. Sige nga, subukan ko pa kung hanggang saan ang proseso. Nagbayad ako ng kalahati ng placement fee. Sabi ko before my departure saka ko ibibigay ang kalahati. First timer ako at wala naman akong adviser na sanay sa pag-aabroad pero medyo maingat naman ako pagdating sa pera. Eh kung lokohan, at least hindi ganon kalaki ang maloloko nila sa akin no!

After a few days, pinakita na sa akin ang ticket. Ganon pala ang hitsura ng airline ticket. Inamoy-amoy ko pa! Hmmm… amoy abroad nga! Hahahaha!!

While going through all the process, basa ako ng basa tungkol sa pag-aabroad. Lalo na sa mga newspaper. At doon ko nakita na pwedeng i-verify sa POEA ang job opportunities abroad. Kaya sumugod ako ng POEA. Nandon nga yong pangalan ng sponsor sa Saudi pati yong pangalan nong agency na pinag-aplayan ko. Ay, mukhang totoo nga!

In short, doon ako nag-decide na This is it. Totohanan na to. Yon yong point na nag-focus na ang utak ko that I will be working overseas. Doon na ako nag-umpisang ma-excite. Abroad ba naman eh.

April 21 ang unang schedule ko sabi ng recruitment agent. Punta naman ako ng airport with matching hatid ng parents ko na parehong umiiyak, hindi kasi nila alam na mag-aabroad ako, basta pinasundo ko lang sila from the province a couple of days before ng flight ko.

Isang regular sized traveling bag ang bitbit ko. Hindi ako nagbitbit ng marami dahil sabi ko doon na lang ako mamimili ng damit or personal things, imported pa (which, later on eh na-realize kong mali. Nandon ka na sa lugar eh di local na yon, di na imported, di ba!).

Naka-maong ako at black na blazer dahil tinakpan ko yong T-shirt ng agency na pilit pinasuot sa akin. For identification purposes daw para madali kaming makita ng sundo sa destination namin. Pero syempre may bayad na 100 pesos yong t-shirt. At may baseball cap pa na may name din at logo nong agency na pinapasuot din sa akin. 150 pesos naman yon. Hindi na ako pumayag. First timer ako sa pag-aabroad but I know I am being branded sa ginagawa nilang yon. And I won’t go on an international flight na akala mo eh endorser ng kanilang agency! (First timer pa lang may sungay na! hehehehe)

So yon nga, porma pa rin ako dahil uso naman ang blazer noon. Naka-low-cut boots pa kaya Spandau Balet ang dating (oooppps… clue yon ah). Yakap sa mga naghatid, maiyak-iyak na rin ako. Pero hindi dahil nalulungkot ako coz I’ll be away from my parents. Hindi ako ganon ka-emotional na tao. Naiiyak ako sa excitement dahil feeling ko adventure yong pupuntahan ko. Mag-aabroad ako! Yehey!!!

Then dumating yong liaison officer nong agency. Ang sabi hindi daw ako makaka-flight that day. Bumalik na lang ako kinabukasan.

Para akong binuhusan ng malamig na tubig. Kinabahan ako. Hanggang makauwi ako sa amin sa Malibay ay worried na worried ako. Bayad na ang placement fee ko. Mukhang naloko ako ng agency. Ano bang malay ko sa chance passenger or wait list. Hindi ko alam yon, hindi sinabi nong liaison officer at lalong hindi ipinaliwanag. Basta bumalik daw ako the following day.

Wala rin akong mapagtanungan. Ang kuya ko (half-brother) na seaman ay nasa barko na at yong pinsan kong nasa Jeddah eh parehong hindi ko naman basta matawagan kasi di pa naman uso ang cell phone noon.

Todo dasal ako nong gabi. Sabi ko, kung naloko man ako ng agency, at least sarili kong ipon yong nalustay ko. Wala akong lupang naisangla or baka, kalabaw at manok na naibenta tulad ng iba. Wala akong mapi-perwisyo kungdi sarili ko lang. Pero sana Lord, hindi naman ako naloko. Masakit pa rin yon huh!

With all my optimism, bumalik ako ng airport the following day. Yon pa rin ang bag na bitbit ko at yon pa rin ang porma ko.

Fortunately, totoo naman ang sinabi ng agency. Confirmed na raw ang flight ko. Binigay na sa akin ang passport ko at tiket. At pinakilala sa akin ang mga kasabay ko – 3 ex-saudi na at isang bata pa ring tulad ko na first timer.

After a few more drama with my parents, pumasok na ako sa departure area. Sunod lang ako ng sunod sa mga kasabay kong beterano. Ginagaya ko lang ang ginagawa nila coz I know they know what they are doing. (Buti na lang hindi humiga sa x-ray machine, baka ginaya ko rin noh?! Hehehehe). Until finally ay makapasok na ako ng aircraft.

Overwhelmed ako pag-upo ko sa aking assigned seat. Ganito pala ang loob ng airplane, ang ganda! Masikip pero ibang-iba sa bus. At ang mga stewardess, ang gaganda! Sa wakas naka-sakay din ako ng airplane. At sa wakas makakarating ako sa ibang bansa.

Yon ang nasa utak ko at that moment. Basta abroad. And to any first-timer na tulad ko, abroad is always a magical word that means money and good life. Abroad. Ibang bansa. Yehey pa ulit!!!

Pero nang mag-taxi na ang aircraft and the pilot started speaking through the intercom, I was shaken back to reality na hindi basta ‘ibang bansa’ ang pupuntahan ko. Pupunta ako ng Saudi!!! And the exotic, unintelligible language the captain is mumbling, isama mo pa yong deep, booming voice nya na nakakatayo ng balahibo, doon na ako kinabahan! Saudi ang pupuntahan ko! Ibang culture, ibang lengwahe. Lengwahe na hindi ko napag-aralan! Baka hindi umubra ang pagka-inglesero ko!

Well, everybody knows by now na unfounded yong mga worries ko noon. Coz here I am in my… uhhh… --th year (ayaw pa rin talagang pabisto) in Saudi and still doing fine. Natatawa na lang ako pag naaalala ko yong first time kong yon.

Bakit ko ba naikwento to? Gusto ko lang makita ng iba na kahit first timer ka, may mga measures kang pwedeng gawin para hindi ka naloloko ng agency. Think, analyze and go with your gut feel. Hindi yong parang na-hipnotismo ka at sunod ng sunod sa sinasabi ng agency. Afterall, totoo yong kasabihan na walang manloloko kung walang nagpapaloko. At siguro, thankful na rin ako dahil matino naman ang unang experience ko. Hindi madugo, painful at traumatic tulad ng iba!

a balancing act

I once read somewhere that in the US, emotional quotient (EQ) is used by top corporations as one of the criteria in hiring their employees. It is given the same weight as the intelligence quotient (IQ) along with the usual qualifications like educational and professional background.

Ang sabi sa report, the rationale behind it daw is that EQ plays an important role in one's decision making. Maaring member ka ng MENSA but if you show signs of emotional immaturity, you'll most likely find your name at the bottom of the short listed names of applicants for the same position.

Sa atin sa Pilipinas, pinasikat ang EQ ng isang commercial ng infant formula. As if naman emotional maturity can be fed into a baby via a feeding bottle. Syempre hindi naman totoo yon. Coz any form of maturity is something you work on as you go along the daily rigors of life.

In my own experience, may mga ilang sitwasyon na where my EQ have played a very crucial role whenever I am making decisions. Dati, dahil immature pa nga ako and for sure mababa pa ang aking emotional quotient, may mga bagay akong nagawa that, looking back, I could have done better kung mataas na sana ang EQ ko.

I've said insensitive things dahil galit ako. Even if my brain is very well aware na makakasakit ako ng feelings ng ibang tao, most specially ng mga family members ko, I still said it because I let my emotions rule me at that particular instance. Resulting to relationships broken and family ties severed.

Sa trabaho, madalas din akong magkaroon ng kabangga simply because of my being sensitive and emotional. Pag nainis ako sa isang tao, sa ginawa nya or sa sinabi nya, I make it a point to confront him/her head on. I retaliate with no mercy. Vengeance is always the order of the day. Buti na lang hindi ako napaaway ng matindi. But I know that situation could have been handled better had I not let my emotions rule me.

Now that I've reached a certain level of maturity (at least sa pagkaka-alam ko, hehehe) I think I'm starting to handle things better. I try to base my decisions not purely on what I feel but a combination of what I feel and what I think. It's hard and it's always a struggle pero sinusubukan ko.

The most recent is the last few months where i went through a period of uncertainty sa trabaho. Kung sinunod ko lang ang nararamdaman ko, I might have packed up my bags and walked out. But my brain tells me that doing what I feel will only lead to my own detriment. Lalayas ako sa isang trabahong nagpapakain sa akin at sa pamilya ko, without even a fall back or alternative plan. Tipong bahala na. All because I don’t feel like staying anymore. Mali di ba. Buti na lang I let my head rule.

I think nag-umpisa yong emotional maturity ko from having experienced love. Corny but true. Without going into details, this is one area where I've proven to myself that I can be one tough cookie. I didn't let myself be blinded by whatever my heart feels pagdating sa mga ganitong sitwasyon. Kaya hindi ko maintindihan yong mga taong nagsasabing they are blindly in love.

Aside from love, the challenges that I faced must have played a big part on my maturity. And these challenges taught me a lot on how to put up with very little for a loftier goal. It also gave me the the ability to bear pain. And in the end, it taught me how to balance my emotions, control my longings, lower my overblown pride and be more secure about who and what I am.

In short, it's a matter of learning how to take the reins in your own hand. Afterall, it's your life. It's your existence. And whatever you do, whatever decisions you make, it is you who will benefit or suffer from it.

So better make better decisions. Analyze what your mind is saying. Dig deep into what your heart is feeling. And use EQ and IQ as a tool. Not the other way around.
Afterall, the head and the heart are both created to give you a balanced life. You cannot let your head rule you all the time. You'll end up as another Hitler or Mussolini. At the same time, hindi pwedeng puro puso ang paiiralin natin. Or else, you'll end up a total wreck. Kaya balansehin natin. And I think that's the best weapon we have in this crazy game called life.

more pne

here's a few pix taken during the PNE concert i was raving about...

(front row, l to r) neil, orlee, raoul and sen (back row, l to r) melchor, roy and junc

(front row) orlee, neil, raoul, me (back row) melchor, roy and junc

ooopppsss... sorry neil

a beautiful symphony

This is almost a week old but as the saying goes, better late than never. That PNE hear my thoughts about their last concert in IPSA last Thursday – late, but better than never at all. Afterall, I wouldn’t be living up to the image I may have already established with the group (PNE) as someone who gives out comments no matter how unsolicited! Dante the opinionated! Hahaha!

Ok. So the venue was IPSA, in a covered court which, thanks to some mean airconditioning system, was comfortably freezing despite the searing heat outside. But, the concrete floor and steel roll-up doors aren’t the best backdrop to the great voices on stage. It is more apt for graduation exercises and class programs, even concerts by some forgettable pop or rock artists. But not for a group of this caliber.

Though I understand the decision to hold the concert in a venue as big as this one. Ticket sales is what’s important at this point. With that in mind, who am I to complain.

Afterall, their singing more than compensates for whatever distractions that bugged me during the concert. Ushers going to and fro with their noisy heels, attendees who walked in at the middle of the program and, despite the requested dress code, came in their walking shorts and flip-flops (darn, I always feel over dressed whenever I attend these concerts!) and kids jumping up and down the wooden bleachers where we were sitting.

But no matter what, the performance on stage is so strong, hypnotic and mesmerizing. There were moments that I got totally lost with the music, oblivious of what or who’s around me. Their fortesissimo, crescendo and decrescendos are now brightly polished there are times it was simply jaw-dropping. Without a doubt, PNE has now brought their skills and performance a notch higher since I last saw them perform. And mind you, they were already superb last year. So how would I describe them now? Winners is more like it!

But of course I wouldn’t be singing praises all the way through. PNE knows I blurt out the good news first before the bad ones.

First, it’s the guest performers once again. I hope PNE would find talents that would complement their already world-class performance. Though I know it would be difficult given the location and social conditions. Besides, if giving way to new, untapped talents is what they aim for, then again, I wouldn’t argue with that. In fact, it’s something noble so I’ll just have to salute the group.

As for the repertoire, I missed Medard’s hair-raising wailing part on the Idemdem Mallida. And so were the bamboo sticks that provided a truly ethnic feel to the song. Having seen it done last year, I felt that a big part of the song was missing. And since this is a competition piece for them, I hope he does it in Austria. Not only does it add drama to the song but it brings the entire performance to a higher dimension. If there’s one song that could win them the gold, this is the one.

Buko Nut Woman? Again, having seen it being done by the genuinely and effortlessly hilarious Nicko, is a bit of a letdown this year. The new version is also funny and I’d have to respect the guy for taking on such a big challenge and rising up to it no matter what. But for someone like me who’ve seen the best, I just can’t help but compare.

One Voice was also a disappointment. Maybe doing it by themselves, without any featured guests, would have made my friend Raoul happier. Coz I know how good they were when they sang it last year. I think PNE should make it their own. Not only does it showcase the range, power and harmony of their voices but it also has a great appeal to the public who doesn’t necessarily appreciate chamber music and other heavier and serious stuff.

One thing that I’m truly pleased this year is that they included songs from one of my favorite musicals – Miss Saigon. With Boi Doi and Why God Why, the long trip from Jubail and back is definitely worth it.

And Only You? Well, it obviously tickled a lot of people in the audience including my friend Jun. Doing that in the encore is a touch of genius. People who, at the start of the concert looked indifferent, piled out of the auditorium with wide grin on their faces.

Overall, I can only hope and pray that the hardwork and dedication being poured by each member of the group translates to winning the Austrian trip. Coz they have already won the hearts of the kababayans who watched them grow all these years. Including me. With that, I’ll say – Go PNE! You now deserve a gold medal. And that’s what you’re bringing back home. No pressure though! Hehehehe….

no. 9: bookworm not

I’ve been ranting about my favorite tv shows, movies and music. Now let me tell you about my reading influences. Though I’m not really a bookworm but if I find something interesting, I stick to it with much loyalty. Until I find something new and different.

If I’m not mistaken, I was still in my 5th grade when I started reading Readers Digest. Nakita ko lang sa pinsan kong may subscription. Although noong una, it was a challenge to read most of the articles because of the words na hindi pa natuturo sa school. Pero kahit ganon, enjoy na enjoy na akong magbasa noon. Ang ginagawa ko na lang, laging nasa tabi ko si Mr. Webster pag meron akong hindi maintindihan na word. And when things got easier, I would be devouring the Digest from cover to cover. Favorite section ko yong It Pays to Increase Your Word Power and the jokes (Humor in Uniform, Life in America, Laughter the Best Medicine, etc..) plus the drama features of real-life adventures, survival stories and other human interest topics.

It went on until my mid-High School days. That time, I was also bitten by the Mills & Boon plague kasi sikat na sikat noon. At siyempre, wag kalimutan ang mga komiks na nire-rent ko pa sa tindahan ni Aling Narda. And of course ang Jingle Extra Hot na puro kachismisan sa showbiz ang laman pero suking-suki din ako ng mga ito nong mga time na yon.

But it didn’t last long coz our English literature teacher introduced me to Chaucer’s Canterbury Tales which started my interest in English novels. Soon enough, I was reading Nathaniel Hawthorne’s The House of the Seven Gables and John Steinbeck’s Of Mice and Men, The Grapes of Wrath and Cannery Row. Yon nga lang, sa tagal na siguro ng panahon, kailangang basahin ko ulit sila ngayon just to remember kung ano ang story nitong mga ito.

Then my interest shifted to espionage thrillers. At dito isa lang ang naging favorite ko – si Frederick Forsyth whose The Day of the Jackal and The Odessa File were even adapted to films na pinanood ko pa rin.

After studies and when I started working, tinamad akong magbasa. Until John Grisham came along. Una kong nabasa yong The Client which is his fourth novel. Then I went back to A Time to Kill, The Firm and The Pelican Brief before continuing on to The Chamber. Pinanood ko rin lahat ng film adaptations nito although I was always disappointed kasi, iba talaga yong picture na tumakbo sa utak ko while I was reading the novel compared doon sa mga interpretation na ginawa sa big screen.

Then tinamad na naman akong magbasa. But years later, I picked-up a copy of his A Painted House which was a total departure from his legal drama genre. And lately, sinubukan ko ulit syang balikan via The Broker which was his first attempt on crime thriller category. It was good but not as brilliant as his earlier works.

Lately, binasa ko rin si Robert Ludlum only because I was amazed by the film The Bourne Identity. And so I read The Holcroft Covenant and The Acquitaine Progression. Pero hanggang don na lang.

Today, most of the time, current events na ang binabasa ko. Signs of ageing? Siguro. But unless there is something that would titillate my interest, saka na lang ako ulit magbasa.